Saturday, May 02, 2009

Love...or something like it


Ah internals are finally over.And I get some time to breathe again.Not exactly though.I have an english presentation due next week and semesters are just round the corner.So I have a lot of studying to catch up with given the fact that we(B.Tech students to be precise) DON'T GODDAMN STUDY throughout the sem.Yeah this is the trend in engineering colleges.Not studying is like part of the rulebook.
Anyway so before I get busy again with text-books I might as well contribute something for this space.And before I begin lemme tell you what I'm about to type today does not fall under the category of 'creative writing'.It is just something that I feel like sharing with others.
Yes you have guessed correctly,I have a few things to say about love.Er no I won't torture you with mushy stuff.Trust me on this.
I am going to talk about loooove that I am witnessing all around me every moment-on my way to college,on the bus,in an empty classroom,in the canteen,in some mall or a cafe` and in infinite number of similar such places.-Love that feels that the cosy nook of a 3-sided book-shelf at a Starmark outlet in Mani Square provides a place more suited for cuddling rather than looking for a book(yea I actually witnessed this disgusting scene).Love that is merely satisfied in being tagged as 'just a relationship'.Love that feels being in a relationship is the 'in-thing'.Love that falls for any pretty girl who wears skirts and make-up or any tall guy with lots of cash.Love that swears by the terms girlfriend/boyfriend and thinks 'lover' is too damn cheesy for it's tastes.Love that loves to do all the things associated with a love relationship except love.
There's so much loooove all around these days that one might wonder if the atmosphere has been filled up with soapy,bubbly wisps of it! ^_^
I'm sorry if you find nothing wrong with all the things that I pointed out in the para before the previous one.But I sure find a hell lotta things that are more than disturbing.Lemme provide examples and illustrate:-

Case 1

Girlfriend-Boyfriend inside a bus squeezed tightly next to one another in a seat,whispering into each other's ears and doing similar such stuff that are better left to imagination.In short they are being all lovey-dovey.Sweet ain't it?
Now enter a hot chick in skin-hugging jeans,designer top and cool sunglasses who climbs aboard.And BAM Mr Boyfriend forgets the existence of Miss Girlfriend and starts with the staring or should I say ogling.And no he doesn't just steal a quick shy glance checking her out,he stares at her time and again as if she were a space alien who has just descended from one of those fancy alien space-ships that we have seen in War of the Worlds and similar such movies.Irritated the hot chick shoots Mr Boyfriend a bone-chilling glare and he finally goes back to coochi-cooing with Miss Girlfriend.
Anyway this routine continues when the next hot babe enters the scene.

Questions of the curious mind:So does Mr Boyfriend love Miss Girlfriend or every hot chick he sees?Or does he keep loving different girls alternately while being in a relationship?Why does Miss Girlfriend tolerate this bullshit?Does she feel similar about other guys as the Boyfriend feels about other girls?*confused*

Case 2

Let's talk about another boyfriend-girlfriend duo.I'll call them F1 and F2.F1,the guy, is totally in love with F2.So he carries her bag and books around,blows a lotta money on her-paying her mobile bills,spending on their dates and even buying her study-books.While F2,the pretty princess,enjoys all the attention.She's the kind of girl who calls up other boys(who aren't even her friends) on her b'day and demands to know why they forgot to wish her.In short since she is pretty she feels she deserves to have the attention of the entire male population and has the right to flirt with them completely ignoring the fact that she is already in a relationship.The general vibe that I get from this couple is that the girl is constantly on the lookout for a better option(or if I may be allowed to say greener pastures?) and the moment she spots it she'd dump F1 and add another name to her list of conquests.

Questions of the curious mind:Is this actually a relationship or a mutual agreement of some sort?Does F2 love F1 or all men?Why is F1 okay with all this crap?Is he just afraid of losing a pretty girlfriend or does he truly love F2?

Now before you roll your eyes and say,'Yeah and who do you think you are to analyze other people's actions and their personal lives?Have you found your soulmate or something?' let me tell you I have not.In fact I was 'in a relationship' with a guy who loved me like crazy and I didn't.I jumped into the relationship without giving the whole thing much thought.At that moment I thought I liked him too.But it turned out to be an illusion.
Such a disaster it was.In the end I had to just make a run for it-away from him.(He was a good guy but we didn't have much in common)I admit to this fact that it was indeed my fault.And trust me I am more than sorry.
But atleast I know that it was a mistake.And I wouldn't repeat the same one again even if I have to be on my own for a while.'Cause I'd prefer to wait for the right person and the right feelings.And until they come to me I am going to stay put and continue with life as it comes.
I don't do relationships just 'cause having a bf/gf is the popular trend.
SO DON'T CALL ME A HYPOCRITE!
I have a few questions(yes again!)
Is true love a term that is better left off in the world of romance novels and rom coms?Are all relationships based on convenience and need?Have all love relationships become..er..PDA-centric?(no PDA doesn't stand for Pushdown Automata...sorry that was a pj)
If you feel like you have the answers to these then please leave a comment 'cause I seriously wanna know!

P.S:The examples I have provided in this post aren't one bit made up.I have witnessed the whole thing mentioned in the first example on a bus I was travelling in.And I personally know the couple I talked about in the second example.

Sig 2

13 comments:

Nightwing said...

i have witnessed them too..and i too have no answers..i stopped thinking about this long back...this type of boys and girls will be there...they will in a relation just for the heck of it..dont try to understand them,you wont be able to....

animita said...

Another good post from you sammy :)...well i don't have the answers to all your questions, but as far as "true love" is considered it hasn't become extinct yet but you'll find it in only 10% of all the couples out there..and having a gf/bf is really a trend these days,people talk about it as if its a compulsion,if you don't have one you are considered strange or something...nowadays people don't really have feelings,they care for no one except themselves...and the "PDA-centric" relations are what we call "in" nowadays,well i know this guy who doesn't have this so called "PDA-centric" relationship with his girlfriend and so the other people call him frustrated for that, i guess you'll understand what i am talking about...i am sure this post will make people think even if they don't agree with you. Keep writing :).

Samadrita said...

@Anish:The thing is these type of people seem to be everywhere in abundant quantities.So it's hard to ignore them!
@Animita:Thanks girl! :)

arnab7889 said...

True "lou" is like ghost everyone has heard about it ,but none has seen it.
Question of the curious mind:Does samadrita always look for PDA-centric couples? I guess there are better things in world.

I loved the variables F1 and F2.Now I know why F1 and F2 remain so close on the keyboard.

NesQuarX said...

Hmm, very observant of you... Well, I'm quite sad to say that among the majority of current youth possessing a boy/girl/whatever-Friend is just as important as having the latest cellphone. Nowadays it's getting rarer to find even simple hormone driven relationships, forget complex emotions and romantic love.

I Am Agel said...

Cool writing..very interesting about you...you're good!
Tony

Samadrita said...

@Arnab:Nope buddy like I said before these couples are everywhere you don't have to work too hard to look for them.And the things they do in public are kind of hard to overlook as well! >_<
And about the F1,F2 comment:Lol!The F1,F2 naming was totally random but now I guess you can't say that! :P
@NesQuarX:Glad to know you agree with me!
@Tony:Thanks!Stay in touch :)

Atindriyo said...

Cupid is dead. Long live Cupid...

Ranjith Gomez said...

Well, i guess there still are people, who believe in true love...let us not let all these incidents spoil true love....

Samadrita said...

@Atindriyo:Yeah I know. -_-

@Ranjith:True love?well donno about that.I've started to believe that these two words only exist in romance novels and romantic comedies..not in real life.

Karthik said...

"Love is an expression and assertion of self esteem, a response to one's own values in the person of another."
"To say 'I love you,' one must know first how to say the 'I.'"
- Ayn Rand
I guess this is what is missing nowadays - Self esteem. Everyone is just so busy building the so-called 'oh-so' attitude, which is fake and despicable and disgusting.

I agree with everything you've said except one. True love doesn't exist anymore except in novels and movies? Well, i guess we all feel that way because we are more interested in Rakhi Sawant ka swayamvar and not in women like Sukhpreet Kaur (Sarabjit's wife) who is fighting for her husband's justice since 19 years. Waiting for her husband to come home for the past 19 years? It is definitely love, isn't it?

SR said...

Well even i dont know what exactly is true love or anything like that cause I dont think any thing can be 100% happiness. watever atleast i havent found such thing yet. still love isnt at all a convenience. gf is but not love. love is truly enjoying company of someone.
and instead of thinking about these heavy topics its much more easier and better to just enjoy the moment!

mohit said...

Even i agree with you that these dayz most of the couples forget where they are and do stuffs which not only makes people stare at them but also makes me question they are they really in love? coz the feelings which they share with each other are out there in open .. I sadly concluded that they are not in love but merely trying to satisfy one another and convince that they love each other . Maybe thats why they fight over such small thinks. i m not saying that people who actually love each other they dont fight , come on fight is a part of life but the percentage of understanding each other is much more and out of 100 reasons they will fight over one.
Any how , I disagree with u on the point that true love doesn't exist in real world, coz just like you even i was in a relationship with a girl who proposed me and i said yes just because even i liked her and thought that i love her. but it didn't turned out to be bad. in fact i actually started loving her truly and honestly. we never used to do anything like u mentioned above and i m so proud of that coz not only me but even she thinks the same way, that our feelings should never be out there in open and it should be personal.
we both knew that we had no future , so we never tried to satisfy each other but only loved each other in fact i still love her , coz where ever i go i find her there in my thoughts , in whatever i do , i always feel there are 2 eyes behind me who are watching me all the time. when i am feeling low and sad its the beautiful time that we have spent together that gives me the strength to get up with a new spirit .
my definition of love before her was a selfish necessity but now i define love by 3 words : sacrifice , forgiveness and being happy .
Just the very thought of her brings a smile on my face. I m not saying that i m a true lover or some thing like that but i know one thing that even without her i m complete , complete to live my life and make whoever comes on my way of life , happy.
And u know what even missing someone teaches u a lot and i just love it when i miss her coz that's the time when she comes in front of me in the form of a tear drop.

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